Conversations With A Three Year Old...

The following is the conversation happened this morning between Rebekah and myself.
Rebekah comes into my room and says...
"Mommy I want to live with you"
"Okaaaaaaaaay"
She then crawls into bed with me and I then understand she meant lay with me.
"Mommy its SO VERY dark outside"
"Do you know why that is Rebekah"
"NOPE. Why Mommy why is it so VERY dark?"
"Because its still the time that big girls should be sleeping in their beds"
"oh, well I'm little and little girls get to sleep with Mommy."
"Nope. I don't see any little girls in here."
"Mommy."
"Yes Rebekah?"
"You ARE my best friend."
"Oh, you are my best friend too."
"So I can sleep with you?"
"nope."
"But I thought I was your best friend. I thought you were my best friend. I thought I was a big girl."
And again, not enough coffee in the world to have a conversation with Rebekah before 10am!!

milk run

So this morning after a great workout and time in my new fantastic study my lovely husband discovered that we had no milk. Now this phenomenon is not new to the Bennett house. We often discover we have no milk, (read: Then let them eat cake) but it is almost always in middle of the day and not at breakfast time. Today it was 7:15 when we discovered the absence of milk in our home. The children were just getting out of bed. Coby was heading to work and we had no cake to give them. So I told the four little chickens as they each came out of their rooms to get jackets and boots on. We went to the store (all chickens in Jammie's and I still not showered from my morning workout) and made a milk run at 7:23am. I think we might need to buy a cow.

Dishes...

The last time I counted I had 4 children and 1 husband. Now I am no math genius but my math says that makes 6. Six people in one house. So if my math is correct then something is wrong. You see, I counted up my dishes the other day before I washed them and these are the numbers I got.
14 glasses
10 plates
7 bowls
8 spoons
9 forks
7 knives
So by my calculations this is what we should be using in a single meal...
6 glasses
6 plates
6 bowls
6 spoons
6 forks
4 knives (Rebekah and Michael don't use knives)
Leaving us with...
8 glasses
4 plates
1 bowl
2 spoons
3 forks
3 knives
So again I am no math genius but something seems to be wrong here. How can we, a family of 6, after just one meal end up with 21 extra items dirty? Do dirty dishes breed? Do dirty dishes hide themselves and then reveal their whereabouts at the most inconvenient time? Or is it possible, just possible that my children are getting extra dishes out and not using the ones they have? By Jove I think that's it!!

ABQOPFN, KSRNTLMYC, WXZ, EUD, GHI and J

School with four chickens is interesting to say the least. I find myself wanting to pull my hair out some days and on others marveling that I have not yet buried one of my lovely chickens in the back 40. Wait, we don't have a back 40, maybe that's why it hasn't happened yet.
At any rate, whatever the reason is, I still have four chickens and no back 40. Today in school we started with our normal Pledge of Allegiance to Mommy, wait, um, America. Then we transitioned into our neat little lessons all happy and excited. Rebekah started off with her right and left hands, you see she is still slightly confused about if she is right or left handed, so I being the lovely up lifting carer of chickens that I am try to let her figure it out for herself, she can write fine with either so every morning this is what happens...
"Rebekah, take a pencil out and..."
"I will use my pink prenzel"
"OK, you use your pink one"
"I will use this prenzel and this hand"
"OK Rebekah, that's fine."
"OH MOMMY!!" (followed with laughter)
"What Rebekah"
"I am silly, I need to use my green prenzel and THIS hand"
"Oh how silly, please do your work."
and this exchange goes on for a few more minutes until she has just the right "prenzel" and hand.
Michael is still trying to figure out why he has to do school work EVERYDAY and why oh why do Brittany, Justin and Rebekah get to do "funn-er" everything and he has to read. This is just some of the exchanges that happen between him and I...
"Michael, I need you to get your pencil out and..."
"K, do I need my pencil or crayons?"
"Your pencil"
and as he is distracted and clearly thinking more about the other chickens and all the way more fun things they are doing we spend a good deal of time discussing just what tool is needed for his work.
Justin knows everything about everything and knows that the world is wrong and he is right so I just let him teach himself...yeah right. This is what Justin and my conversations look like...
"Mommy, I know"
"You know?"
"Yup, I know, can I just do my work?"
"OK, just humor me and listen, I like to hear myself talk."
"What?"
"Just humor me, I like the sound of my voice."
"Mom, you are crazy."
"You know whats crazy?"
"What?"
"That we are having this conversation for the bagillionth time."
"bagillionth?"
"Yes. Please listen to my instructions and then you can decide if you want to do it the way I said or the way you want to. Okay?"
"k"
And last but not least this is the interaction between Brittany and myself...
"Mommy, if it wants to know what the fraction is and 7 of the 10 squares are shaded the the fraction would be 7/7 right?"
"Brittany listen to your question..."
"If 7 of the 10 are shaded..."
"Say it again"
"7 of the 10..."
"Almost there"
"OHHHHHH, 7/10. HA HA!!!"
Ok, so to recap:
1. I still have four chickens
2. I am still homeschooling four chickens.
3. My sanity is still in the lost and found somewhere, I just don't know where the lost and found is...

Coloring 101

I have been trying to spend more one on one time with Rebekah, thinking it might help her feel a little more important. I misjudged the time allotment, and the outcome has been catastrophic. She now "KNOWS" she is the queen of Sheba and no longer feels like we are her royal subjects, but KNOWS we are there to serve her and if we do not act quickly she will execute her punishment immediately.
On Thursday I could tell she was feeling a little left out so I made the mistake of asking her if she wanted to watch a movie and snuggle on my bed just her and I. She now feels like she gets a movie EVERYDAY and informed me this morning "Mommy, we DID NOT watch my movie yesterday" followed with "Mommy, you NEED to watch a movie with me TODAY!"
On Saturday she wanted to color with me. I told her I would but I needed to make dinner too, so there would be times I needed to get up to do things in the kitchen. She informed me that it would be ok as long as I came right back and continued to color with her. I thought to myself, this is a good thing I can bring out super power #2 and get this done. Boy was I wrong. You see I did not realise that I was coloring with an art critic as well as a queen. This is just some of what I heard over the next few minutes...
"Mommy you not doing that right"
"No Mommy use this color"
~Sigh~ "Mommy, you need to color nicer"
"Um, you are not done Mommy"
"Mommy do it nice, like this"
and when I went to get up to check on dinner I received a "mommy look" and...
"Mommy, you are not done"
"Mommy, you cant leave it like this"
"Mommy, you said you were gonna color with me"
"Mommy, I thought you were going to color"
"Mommy, you need to color with me"
"Mommy, we are NOT done yet"
I did come back and color after a quick reprimand. (for her from me NOT the other way around) But alas my coloring did not measure up to her criteria and her picture is on the fridge not mine. Sad day when my art cant make it onto the fridge...

The WORST sound in the world

So I just heard the worst sound in the world. Its one I hear everyday and it makes me sick.
No its not a screaming child.
No not a crying animal.
Nope not finger nails on a chalkboard.
It is the most terrifying sound known to man. The thought of it makes me want to hide in my bedroom and pull the bed covers over my head.
No its not an explosion.
No not fighting.
Nope not even the sound of a broken bone.
I can feel it coming, I dread its happening. Its a short low beep. When it happens I know my coffee will be cold in the next 20 minutes. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just keep swimming...

We are spending a few days in Belgrade MT, its about 10 miles from Bozeman, for some church convention meetings. While Coby is in meetings all day I have been taking the kids to great far off places such as museums, pools, and Target. In these three days of adventure we have been exploring the world we call "The City" we have seen Dinosaurs, and talked about how silly it was that the person who made the signs messed up and said "Billions of years ago". We ventured to the world of Target, and were reminded how nice it is to not be in "City Stores" around halloween. We watched a star show at the planetarium and giggled to ourselves as they said that the earth took billions of years to create and left when Justin looked at me and said "We were NEVER bugs?!?!" as a single celled organism flashed on the screen...I am still trying to figure out why in a star show that is 30 minutes long they spend at least 15 minutes talking about the "big bang" and "evolution". (We left when the "bug" thing happened and did not stay to see their "take" on Gods creation of our amazing solar system) We enjoyed fine dinning that did NOT include McDonald's, Pizza Hut, DQ, or Subway. I really enjoyed the WWII memorial that we walked through and being able to explain to Brittany and Justin just what was going on in the pictures, so many wide eyed questioning moments there. We enjoyed swimming in the pool (or 'lake' as our friends 2 year old calls it) Rebekah wanted to "paddle on the water" in the canoe that was in the lobby, it was just her size. When swimming Rebekah nearly drowned 19 times, after each time I would say "yup you scared me too" to that she would reply "nope I not scared. I'm swimming." Michael quickly overcame his fear of the water and tonight was even jumping off the ledge by himself into 3 feet of water without me standing there. Rebekah on the other hand was jumping in when I had my back turned and nearly drowned 19 times and was mad when I took her out. Any ideas on giving her a healthy fear of water? I am game for any!! We have had so much fun in the "true" City. I am no longer letting my kids call Kalispell a city, we have new standards for a city and they are as follows...
1. Has an Old Navy
2. Has more than 10 "big chain" restaurant's
3. It takes more then 5 minutes to walk from one end of the mall to the other.
4. Have a museum that talks about "crazy evolution stuff" as Brittany would say.
So these are the requirements for a city. If you are not sure if you live in a city just look back and measure up to this scale, it really is very accurate.

October

It is the first of October. Fall is here. COLD IS HERE!!! Brittany awoke this morning and proclaimed "Its October First! Its MY Birthday Month!!" So, a grand tradition is being passed down from memaw to mother to granddaughter. My concern with this comes in when thinking of my youngest. You see out of ALL my children Brittany is the one I have to worry least about something going to her head. Rebekah is the one I worry most about. After Brittany's proclamation Rebekah promptly said "Brittany, then its MINE!" Brittany being the sweet sister she is nicely said, "well Bekah, its Justin's, then Jesus', then yours. Its REALLY close." to that Rebekah said "HUMPH!! Brittany, Its mine. Jesus said it could be mine first." Riiiiight Bekah, I forgot you and Jesus were tight.